Trembling, She Forgave

 My heart, crushed by bitter ugliness,

who took the form of a familiar person.

A friend called him brother,

I called him stranger as his hands 

slithered where they didn't belong.

Forgiveness?

What could it be?

I tried to be friendly

as this joke backfired on me.

Crushed, and trying to gather myself,

making sense of the situation.

Too young to understand,

too young to consent

to such an atrocious act.

How to forgive?

How to forgive?

Time changes everything, 

through trauma 

and flashbacks.

I look at the past through a lens, 

as if it happened to another person.

Would I tell this child to forgive?

Never!

I would tell her to let 

time heal her wounds, 

but forgiveness is for 

the greatest of friends and family.

I Will Achieve

 For the first time in forever, 

I felt joy: 

A quiet miracle, 

alone, 

in my mind. 

Family, 

a couple's comradery, 

a feeling of togetherness. 

My wishes fade so far 

in the moment of affection. 

Everything I have is my focus. 

To hold tight, 

and let my heart wander to you, 

as it does. 

To let each dream of mine 

come true in my own time. 

At times, 

one person, 

and a second of faith, 

is the push needed to achieve.

My Dominion Is My Worth

 The world exists for me

and each rational creature in it.

I've built my world

in this messy house of mine;

a writer's trade,

a crafter's heart,

an engineer's home.

The idea in my mind telling me,

I do make a difference.

Who can stop me from success?

No one but myself,

getting in my own way.

My worth, my dominion,

doesn't count on anyone but me.

A new question is,

how do I get out of my dominion,

and into the universe?

I can't stop wanting more,

donating more,

taking less.

I'm forevermore looking to expand my world,

my worth, and my dominion.

Stay With Me

 Trying my hardest

to ease humanity's unseen illnesses.

Unsure of whether I'm making a difference or not,

I put myself out into the world of sickness.

I push past my fears

to find healing isn't so far from us.

Some have to leap through hoops to get help.

Fairness isn't awarded

to everyone without a support system.

It's wise for the ill know their options,

learn how to stay in a good mental-space,

to be an example for the less fortunate.

No one knows the power a person can possess

if you don't stick around long enough to see it.

So when their life is at risk,

I'll remind them of their strength,

I will not let them down!

Only Aurora Knows

 The world stopped,

while gaining momentum,

stars crashed into the earth for me.

I saw so much more than black,

I saw stars of each color.

My awareness was amethyst 

in an array of ways,

gorgeous, you could say. 

I wish I saw myself this way.

Enamored by Aurora's 

earthly nightlight,

I wonder if I could be her light.

Could I be capable of lighting

the room I walk in?

Could I be a purple glow 

to catch your eye?

Gravity

 I'm moving on from deaf ears

and empty chair audiences.

The empty effort is no more.

I'm moving forward,

walking down easier avenues.

I will find the weight of my words,

the gravity of my achievements.

My hope is to change the heart of man,

to ease his aching soul.

As each man has the potential

to save our dying earth,

if we award them the occasion.

These are the abilities of humanity,

the powers we possess.

To speak until we lose our voices,

then find a listening ear.

It only takes two to change the world,

one to speak of invention,

and the other a hand in creation.

If You Can Find It

 A decade passed,

my head was in the clouds,

fueled by hopes and dreams.

Today I'm dedicated

to setting lofty goals,

and achieving each one.

On occasion,

my head drifts back to those dreams

and I find myself living them.

Whether known, or unknown,

I have words in the world.

I'm committed,

despite any judgment,

I carry on,

I keep writing.

My dreams may not be

what I thought they would be.

I'm the stubborn girl

who has everything

she wanted out of life.

After getting everything I wanted,

I found more.

A bottomless well of inspiration,

a breath-taking sip of hope.

The water is clear,

will not muddy,

pure and ready to drink.

So help yourself to the well.

Before Anyone Else

 Dead friendship dreams remind me 

of the troubles I left behind.

What a blessing to form new friendships. 

Because the greatest of friends 

will lift you up when you fall, 

rather than drag you through the mud. 

When getting caught up in memories, 

don't forget the moment you're living in. 

The past is dead and gone, 

and there's nothing you can do to fix past mishaps. 

Past opportunities- lost, 

but the future will bring along new ones. 

New people will come along, 

some will be for you, 

some will be against you. 

You don't have to allow anyone 

in your life who will bring you down. 

Most empowering, love yourself first.

You Can Get Back Up

 Tragedy- a stumble 

with no ability to get back up. 

No one's around to lend a hand, 

I find my own arms 

unable to pick you up. 

Helpless, I can only hand 

you the encouragement 

to get up on your own. 

It's heartbreaking how I wish 

I could do something to help 

you move the world. 

There are times when you fall, 

and no one can help you up. 

The strength must come from within yourself. 

The biggest tragedy is the limbo-state 

you find yourself stuck in. 

Questioning if you can feel normal once more. 

Hang in there, it takes time, it will get better. 

The only problem is, no one knows when, 

but if you keep at it, it will be okay. 

While I can't explain life and it's complexities. 

I can only explain me, how it's a miracle I'm alive. 

I don't know how to fix people, 

I only know how to speak to them. 

Be careful with your words 

because you don't know 

when your words could count the most. 

A simple hello can make a person's morning. 

At times, it's essential to tell someone, 

"You're not hopeless, you're not a tragedy."

It Can Only Break Me

 When Reality pricks at me, 

it's a needle to gather the blood 

modern medicine needs.

How much to keep me safe 

from mental illness and myself?

Take everything 

you need from me Reality.

Whatever it takes to bring me back 

to a home I can remember.

Home isn't what it once was, 

isn't safe, 

isn't what I remembered.

Home has become a place 

where my mind tricks me.

The loved side of me left, 

and fear is what's left.

Reality left me frantic, 

searching for answers 

to questions which don't exist.

Responsibility became my undertaking, 

the consequences are mine to take, 

no matter what they are.

Reality is a pill to take, 

to end the fear, 

to make me remember who to hold dear.

Reality could try its worst, 

but it couldn't break my heart, 

my relationships.