Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Don't Deprive Yourself with Deception

We all have demons,

but how often do we take off our red mask
showing just how they get the best of us?

The mask may be imaginary,
but it's a growing problem
sitting in the pews at the church of
"Can you help me please?"

Yet most don't ever know,
or can't even admit it's needed.

It's sad how we're so quick to criticize
but can't admit our own imperfections
or even begin to decipher our daily demons
because we're too busy masquerading around in red.

While we're ignoring our harsh realities, dancing
our way through life, internally
wounded and deteriorating underneath-

what I fear most about all of this
is how many of us are unaware
we're wearing a mask at all.




Monday, May 22, 2017

Unfiltered this Morning

Food was the first thing I worshiped.

Introduced prior to god,
love, or heartbreak.

Blood is life,
water is life,
food
is
life.

Likewise,
it's the devil in you.
Making you eat it,
until you're wider
than you've been
in your entire life.

So let me explain that
all the chocolate in world
can't solve your problems.
It hits the tongue,
makes you smile,
roll your eyes and go yum.
Damn that's good!
Everything seems to be okay
for a moment.

Addiction.

How is lack of self control
considered an eating disorder?

I love it,
eat it
and I'm able
to indulge myself.

I weighed 200 pounds at 13 years old.
Struggled with obesity most of my life.

Set myself free from dietary
worry with veganism.

Highest weight 250,
at a mere 5 feet tall.
Forget being preachy,
but it bothers me,
this thing called obesity.

The leading caused of heart disease.
The unsolvable "problem"
which isn't even a problem at all.

We're fat because we choose to be.

Self control isn't the issue,
the issue is what you're eating.
This is the story for us all
vegan or bacon, it doesn't matter
what your body craves.


Most Americans stuff their faces
with steroid injected chicken.

I'm trying new things.

Figuring out what the best ratio
of water is to TVP.

America-understand,
you can be healthier if you try.
A message you'll hear,
and slap another stinky
steak on your plate.

Even if most don't,
I care for the state
of our health as a whole.
So please,
Americans,
start taking better care of yourselves.



Friday, May 12, 2017

Beauty in the Misery

It's impossible to hear a tune if you're deaf,
but the rhythm like an echo,
waves through sound.

Rattling your bones to the beat in the air.

It's motive to save moments of misery,
because I would be nowhere
without the wave pushing me along.

A blind man is eyeless, unable to see the sun.
It's scorch and burn isn't any different for him
even though he's got zero ability to see.

Set your mediocre
senses to the side
in the moment.

Ask yourself,
how does the misery
affect your ability to live in it?

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

The Story Can't End Yet

I claimed cancer when I was sick;

Perhaps
because in my state of mind
there was no other
explanation

(This must be what cancer feels like.)

for all the
frustration.

(Mental clutter in my mind.)

I was just a
floating blob
of contagious cancer.

Everywhere I went
I made you
sick of me too.

"Are you sick of me yet? "

My cancerous thoughts
spoke to me in a
deep and daunting whisper.

"You know?"
"You can give up at any moment."
"Are you done yet? "

Those thoughts that snake their way in
don't see the two different people
living inside of me;

an imp on one shoulder,
an angel on the other.

They only seek to kill my spirit.

"You're right-"
So I admit defeat;

"I don't have to take this anymore."

instead of giving up and giving in
to the so called inevitable-

I kept going until I was
tired, calloused and empty inside.

Of course I could have just given up,
but there's got to be
something more
at the end of this sentence.



Self Destructing Humanity (of Unsustainability)

I have this fantastic thing
called a life,

that can quickly
take a tragic nose diving
turn for the worst at any moment.

At times it's a daring thing to keep,
yet over seven billion of us do it every day,
and we're growing still.

So by seven billion,
you think
we would have learned by now
that the aggression
not taken out on ourselves is either;

taken out on our planet,
or even worse,

each other.

So pay attention,
you'll see it coming.








Sunday, May 7, 2017

Summer is Over

Friends who fade away
like dead autumn leaves
scattered about the earth- 

without a trace, 
they dry up and crinkle
deserting me with a loud mess
behind them everywhere they go. 

Kindness is sort of like the wind
that blows them off my branches for me. 

He's my friend until our lives are complete, 
depending on who dies first, 
him or me, at least he returns for me,
and of course I'm that tree. 

This star that shines closest to me, 
the sun, 
is not always some heavenly abode 
hanging out up in the sky above.

Sometime's I only see it's light in the darkness- 
reflecting from the winter snow 
while my roots freeze over below.

The thought of you leaves 
tend to be the bitter coldness winter brings, 
because I know you're buried 
somewhere under the layers 
of ice, snow, slush 
and memories of who we use to be.

I live knowing I'll have lush green new leaves 
when spring arrives again someday, 
they too will wilt away in an autumn breeze.

Just like that, no goodbye-
I will never see you again.



Friday, May 5, 2017

I Promise

Even when the world
seems to be spiraling around you,

don't go up in the tornado
of misfortune going on around you.

Keep both feet planted firmly in the ground.

Keep in mind that despite your circumstance,
you've still got a grasp of your significance.

Even if those feet are planted in;
sadness,
        despair,
                loneliness,
                            guilt,
                                    shame
or any other particular ailment.

Those are things worth feeling
when the wind dies down
and you can finally see the sun again.



Thursday, May 4, 2017

Scrap

If I could choose my last words-
they'd be I love you
and I'll see you later.

There's no need for goodbyes,
but let's say I wouldn't die
until my last words were said.

Well, I'd never stop speaking.

I did a lot to obtain happiness today
and the last thing I need
is to mess with someone else's.

Either way, everyone has to know
every breath we take
will become more shallow
until one day we are no more.

What do we become then?

Are we more than a dead body
in a beautiful casket
six feet blow the cold ground?

I won't bore you with my beliefs today,
but I'll let you know that the answers are
so often more than meet the eye.