Monday, October 30, 2017

There's Hope For You Yet

People will hate you
just for being
in the body
you were born in.

Then there are those
who try so hard
to hate you but can't.

You see,
I study people
all the time. . .

I study you,
write you down,
read you.

Then suddenly
I'm concerned about
where your heart's at.

How am I
supposed to know?

I lost myself
in that thought
for a little while,

then found myself again.

Don't allow your heart
to be broken so quickly.

Then I put the pen down. . .

I realized
that so many people
suffer a brokenness
that can not be fixed
by my words alone.

But Perhaps. . .

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Who Needs Me

If compulsive thoughts could think
would they realize how hard they make my life?

Thoughts grow legs,
crawl all over me.
A nervous scratch,
the skin welts over.

If you scratch hard enough,
irritated and red,
an itch becomes a burn.
You're numb to it.

Has anxiousness ever given you anything
worth living through?

Can you amount to anything
without me

I'm an odd vessel you work through.

Trust me,
I don't need you,
but I'm sure it's you. . .

Friday, October 6, 2017

Live Your Lives

How can I say all I need to digest the past decade?
Seems as if time has suspended too long.
Everyone's got their nostalgia goggles on.

They continue ranting the same subjects
round in circles. . .

Seems they found something new to riot.

Incited by

news stands who use public tragedies
as a platform to abuse and
voice their political agendas.

We should learn to look
for warning signs . .

How to anatomize-
to be awake and aware
of what surrounds us.


How to find a way to be safe.

Instead of stuck in the loop of spinal absence.

How did defending yourself become
a thing to put on the back-burner?

You have to know our importance . . .

exceeds the lack of information
any news outlet seems to push on us.

It's sad if you don't realize,
our societal issues aren't alone
in the headlines anymore.

Friday, September 29, 2017

Whoever She May Be

I haven't come across a landscape
with a beauty that took my breath away. . .

I'm too busy holding my breath
over the fur on a bee's back.

Thinking  how,
if I were
a little smaller,
or he bigger-

I might have him
in my living room
brushing pollen
from his fur.

Teaching him to talk
like a parrot,
or fetch like Fido.

Thinking if I were smaller,
how each blade of grass
would be a tree to me.
My yard a vast forest
of various leggy creatures
and crawly things.

Oh, and don't forget those wings.

But if he were bigger,
most would worry
he had a stinging intent to kill.

His majesty liquidated.
Reduced to a beast with venom,
who will do anything
to protect his queen.

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Spare Yourself

If you're facing a friendship
with a user or abuser;

It's important to keep in mind
that forgiveness may be a single step away.

Forgiveness doesn't erase
the things they've done
or may do in the future.

It eases the pain and malice
in your heart toward that person
and their wrongdoings.

However, what seems to be
a harsh consequence of their actions.

Might be the end of a relationship.

Because you can forgive without
allowing the use or abuse to continue.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

George in an Empty Nutshell

He sunk his claws deep within,
for a long time I could feel them
dragging, and buried in my skin.

Wherever did he go?
Nix me needing to know.
No I don't miss him so.

I'm done letting him use me as if
I'm a broken toy to pull spare parts from.

How many parts can he pull
until I become empty?

The worst part is that he filled me
with the broken parts of his own machine.

In the places I had;
happiness- he replaced with nervousness,
strength with crisis, trust with doubt,
peace with pain, love with fear and apathy. . .

And the list goes on and on.

It took a prodigy to lift those parts from me,
to apologize for the past.

Whatever it brought my way.

Even if blameless,
the prodigy choose to share
the good parts of itself with me.

We'd bare the burden of the bad with each other.

Fixing; worry with self-esteem,
disarray with deliverance, dread with faith,
trouble with security, angst and coldness with compassion.

I hope.

Maybe one day he'll find a prodigy of his own,
instead of stripping the fortune away from others.

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Some Words Should Be Wasted

he asked the world,

"Who taught you to hate yourself?"

My question is,
in what moment did we make it okay?

With enough worry focused on
our loss of free speech over
someone else's diffidence.

Who taught you it was okay
to hate yourself despite
what anyone else had to say?

What happened to designating
your own opinions?

And what happened to keeping some silent?

Anyone with an intention to be so obnoxious
with their words toward you.

Should have a sentiment
worth it's weight in your eyes.

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

If I Seem Withdrawn (I Am)

Independent loneliness-
the choice to be alone
and the reason is unknown.

Some prefer the silence,
 or in some circumstances,
they even prefer the noise;

the clicking that fingers
create on these keys.
The hum of thoughts in your head.
Or even shouting screams of matches
you need to make and win in your mind.

To be so close,  or so far:
from everyone.
And everything you've ever
wanted to achieve-
never forgetting to be right
beyond your fingertips.

Running, and out of breath
for the next to last opportunity
life will never allow you to take

because it will tear away
the lonely home you have.

One person,
alone, myself is enough,
and anyone else is too perplexing
to figure out.

Thursday, August 10, 2017

All for a Band-Aid

If we met as children,
I'm shameless in wondering
how life would've been.

I do wish it was this way,
because mine would've been
undoubtedly kinder with you in it sooner.

You must've been incredibly encouraging.

I imagine a playground scenario-
on the pavement I've fallen,
destined to scrape my knee.

As I'm gruff to rise from my fallen state,
your hand is out in front of my face. . .

Unable to look to yours
or grab your hand in the moment
I hear your voice asking me,
"You aren't gonna cry are you?"

I glance at you, sighing a single

So you say to me,

You, eager to ask
in so few words
if my knee is okay.

"Do you need a band-aid?"

We're so sickeningly sweet,
whether we met today
or on the teeter-totters-

nothing would stop you from
walking me to the nurse if I needed you.

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

What a Diagnosis

I hope you don't hold your breath
trying  to understand
the lot of lop-sided love in this life.

Driving people to their crummy jobs
looking for a lot of lop-sided affairs.

How can you want what you can't have?

So the innocent half of the affair
becomes lop-sided trying to understand.

What happened?
Toss in a
How could you?
in an instant.

Horrified, you want to make it work.
Even with a 100% failure rate.

Yea, he won't leave his wife for you,
won't tell her you exist.
No way he'll let you meet his family,
or care for one you see inside your head.

To him, you're a problem
and a tasty one at that.

Lop-sided became the sad and solitary
relationship you're too familiar with.