Without that voice speaking inside my head,
the desperation to be done with this disease
would have had me dead long ago.
Despite how insane you may think
it is for me to believe this voice is God;
He's always spoken to me
through the endeavor
against depression depleting me
and anxiety anxiously eating away at me,
He's forever pushing me
to move on
through my thoughts,
regardless of how pathetic
this fight has made me feel,
He's even had me reasoning
with myself on my darkest days.
So while I can't explain
His existence in my heart,
I can understand how questionable it is,
but I also can't explain my consistent
and incomprehensible desire to stay alive.