Monday, April 29, 2013

Deep Inside Dwells Ugly

I remember writing,
"Ugly doesn't exist."

I remembered and realized
the moment I learned
how hard it had been
to shake the feeling
of obtaining a frightening relationship.

That I was wrong,
and ugly exists
in ways other than facets,
only to realize later
that the damage
had already been done.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Until I Realize, I Don't Need Another Friend Standing in the Shadows.

I was all an act.

You hand me the magic pill,
I pop it down, and it's gone.
I remember pulling tricks
with my wit.
You thought it went down the hatch,
but it never left my hand

You supplied, I took,
but never swallowed.

I was a lie,
my real motive
was to steal as much
as I possibly could,
so you wouldn't kill yourself.

If it took an act,
or a lie, who cares?

I had my own agenda,
and still, it backfired on me.

I was never suicidal,
that was all an act,
still, the self harm was real.

Despite the evidence,
I was just depressed,
desperate to save you.

at the cost of my lies,
we both took the bullet
in the end.

It only went through
me to get to you.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Inebriation Robs You of Your Intellect.

I'm worried about good times
and how there aren't enough to spare.

I've been thinking about good times,
and how every one from the past
has a burden to bring with it.

I'm worried about the unworthy,
the wicked,
and the silhouette of the sinister
masking itself as a good time.

That bottle you bring
only sells your time short,
and removes any memory
of a good time from your system.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Wake Up, the Dream is Over, Move On.

I beat my brains out
thinking of you.
I want to say
I miss you dearly,
but I don't.

I'd love to believe
any semblance of friendship
we once had was real,

but surely I'd be kidding
myself if I did.

I was only a drifter
floating around in a pond
full of meaningless fish.

We all do it,
and believe it's meaningful
but when you
watched me walk away;

If I ever meant a thing
to you at all
surely you would've stopped me.

Times like these put me to sleep.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013


I, alone,
am powerless,
still somehow I live my life.

I forgot
how close we were,
a friendship from years ago.

I, myself,
am one project
that will never be complete.

I thought of
you, as selfless
as a fighting friend can be.

You deserve
all the fortune
that balances in your life.