Sunday, May 22, 2016

My Night at the Roxbury

My pen between my lips
as I decide how
I should say what
I'd want to say next,

or sometimes my teeth gently biting
the end of the eraser
until it seems to disappear.

My mind, once cluttered,
now quiet hears the soft hum
of traffic from a distance,
and when it's too late,
it hears the train horn
screaming down the street.

So suddenly I remember
how he once said he
was amazed by how we were able
to make ourselves heard.

Even if it meant,
we were tearing the foam
from the arms of the hospital chairs,
we were made to feel as if
it was a safe place to be vulnerable.

I sensed it was a place of healing,
a place to build the foundation
for a well balanced brain and well being.

Somehow I said more
with the clutter in my head
just trying to empty it out,
than I ever would when aware of my actions.

I wish I could obtain the same courage
as I had in an unsound state,
it's something important that I lost.

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

A Goodbye as I Try to Let it Go

When your tears are so acidic
they sting your cheeks
over the family
you've never had the opportunity to have-

Do you ever stop grieving
over your losses?

Or is your only choice to move on
into a world that seems so abysmal
without the ones you could've loved?

Stop Over-Thinking Things

You spend your entire existence
trying to get your life together,

but when there's no explanation
for an unsound mind
or unsound decisions made as a result,

it's  a good time to let it fall apart
and let the dust settle.

Even without the ability to think clearly,
as long as you have a heartbeat
and a deep breath to take
sometimes it's okay to let life fall apart.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

Accepting Yourself

Who am I?

I'm a nobody,
blessed by the vast graveyard
of indifferent emotions
I've been handed.

Despite my eccentricities;
my failure to be courageous,
my lack of self esteem,
and the hand dealt to me in life,

I'd still rather be no one else
but a nobody.

Sometimes the truth screams
so loudly at me,
it says,
"I am who I am meant to be."